How on earth did it get to be May 21 already? Well, here we are then, and I am officially a 2nd year volunteer as of Tuesday. Neat, huh? That means I am halfway through with my time as an actual volunteer and over halfway done with the time I have allotted my self to live in Morocco. Or, as my thoughts ran about 2 weeks ago: part II of "Jini’s" Peace Corps experience has officially begun. That thought ran across my mind the evening I went to go and meet my sitemate, Meg, to show her the way to our little village. The new routine has yet to establish itself, probably won’t establish itself until she moves out of home stay and into her house.
I keep finding myself thinking about this year vs. last year. And what it was like getting dropped into this little village, alone, and figuring out how to speak and who I was going to be, here, at the same time. It wasn’t much fun, actually. I didn’t realize it at the time, as I was just putting one foot in front of the other, one word after the next. That in-the-zone dodged mindset that running cross-country with asthma teaches one. Thankfully, all things pass. J Some 2 to 4 months later, I had learned enough to be able to hold actual conversations in our obscure little dialect here, and, more importantly, had found what looked like a workable way for me to be here. I had some ideas for projects, I had helped others complete their projects, I had learned how to cook, was living in my own house, had my own pets, and was slowly establishing myself as myself (instead of that-girl-staying-with-the-sheikh). Mom commented on the phone at that time: "you sound much happier now than you did during the summer." And I realized, I am! And, I am glad to report, I still am! Projects move along… slowly… but they do move all the same. I have good friends here, a sweet (in the both old-fashioned sense, and the sweet-awesome sense) boyfriend, good Moroccan friends, and a slow-born but no less real affection for this land, this place. I figured out a way to not feel spiritually alone, too. That was key. I still don’t know if two years will be "enough" time for me here, or if I’ll extend, or if sometime in the next couple months I will suddenly realize that I am "done" with life here. It happens. We’ve lost 6, I think, volunteers from my stage (including both Health and Environment). Some broke themselves on the mountains or were broken by parasites, some got sick of the …slowly… aspect of things here, some became discouraged by the ministry they work with, some just wanted to go home. I can only hope that if I should find myself feeling "done" that I will find it in me to finish what I have begun. Because, as my brother says, "that’s how I do!" The first volunteer to live in O. Ali was a health volunteer who called it quits after three months. Meg is her replacement. I am doing what I can to help her adjust to life here with more ease than I did. Because there is MUCH for us to do here, though it isn’t always easy to see how one ought to do it. And because—selfishly—I like having another volunteer here. For company. For when I want to cook up a good stir-fry and share it with someone that will eat it from enjoyment and not because they feel bad for my effort. Isolated Moroccans are notorious for not liking food they aren’t used to. J
So, this is phase two, part II, the halfway point. Restlessness resurfaces after months of focused effort on settling myself in this place. Projects move ahead… slowly… and I say good-bye to friends who were here a year before me. In one year, that will be me.
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